They're So Special

We spent the better part, of last week, in Las Vegas. The band was performing. We were getting to meet up with a some of our friends people. And these ones too! It was a nice week. I did miss Lauren. Now that she's in school, it's so hard to travel with her. We don't want her to miss school. So she gets to hangout with my parents.

But there was something about being in Las Vegas. And working this event. With all this glitz and glam. That got me thinking. I want my girls to be confident in themselves. To not depend on makeup, hair, jewelry, clothes, men. I want them to know, each of them are so special. So unique. And amazing. Just because they are, who they are.

I guess I'm feeling this way, because they are getting older. Robbie walks around, like his daddy. Super confident. He ALWAYS tells us, he's going to be like daddy. Work on the Ranch. Be a daddy. Have a wife. Now I know, my boy is only 2 years old. But he's got his plan going. I'm sure, he'll probably change his mind. A 100 times, before he gets "there." But he has a clue.

I want Lauren and Abby to have that same confidence. To know, they don't need to be like a model. Or an actress. That they are perfect the way they are. That they can be mommas like me. Or be like T-Lo, and become doctors. That they can do anything.

Everyday, our little girls are hammered with so many ads, magazines, images that are not real. I don't want my daughters to think only of labels, pounds on a scale, boys, and the such. It makes me realize more and more, that I need to set this example for them.

They know that momma doesn't always wear makeup, dress up, or even do her hair. But that I do these things for myself. To feel better. To have fun. That buying all this makeup, is not normal. But my job. I want them to have confidence in themselves.

More importantly, I want them to turn to God. Ask him for guidance. To know that magazines, aren't about "real life." Just fun stuff. That we should weigh more than 100 lbs. That drinking and getting arrested are not the "normal." I want them to know, they don't need all of these things. Because they're already so special! I want my girls to know this. We love them. Just the way they are!!

~Manders

New in 2012: Bunny Cake

My new thing this week, was making this Bunny Cake. I'm not a "fancy" baker. I make cupcakes, pies, cookies, cakes, etc. But nothing too fancy. Not shaped. Not bunnies. No fancy piping.

But this week, a few friends and I, decided to meet for a "Lunch and Play Date." For us and our kids. And I wanted to make something fun. Interesting. And something "Spring-y."

Lola pointed me to this recipe. Which was amazing! Now I feel like, I should have been doing this years ago! There were a few "challenging" things, but it was overall super easy! How could it not be? You use a box cake, and store bought frosting!



The thing I learned about making this cake was, to be a little patient. :) And to bake it, when my kiddos were napping. That worked perfectly! After I baked the cake, and "shaped it," I stuck it in the freezer. Just like the instructions said. It made frosting, and decorating it, so much easier!

Now that I've tackled one cake, I might try something else! I don't know. Something fun for Mother's Day. But I know one thing, I'll definitely be baking this cake, for Easter. I'm sure my family will enjoy it!

~Manders

The Train

A while back, Lola was telling me about this AMAZING train! That is just a few hours away. And they specialize, in a "Child's Ride." On this, real train. An old fashioned train! Lola and this guy, went on the "Adult version," of the train ride. Back in October. And they loved it!



So I did some research. The train runs from the late Spring, well into Fall. And it sounds like a great idea! The regular ride, is an all day adventure. But the "Kid Version," is just an afternoon. After talking with Billy, we made reservations. I'm positive, that the kids are going to love it!

Between, we're going to stay in a cute, mountain town. For a couple of days. And our friends, Sals and David, are also going on the train! I'm not sure, when they booked their trip. But I sorta hope, that we're all going, at the same time. I think it would be so much fun! 8 kids, and 4 adults. On an open car train. In the mountains. I'm already so excited!

And honestly, I can't wait to see Robbie, on the train. I feel like, so much of the time, he gets stuck doing "Girl Things." Because he has 2 big sisters. And much of the time, we're doing things, that Lauren enjoys. This is definitely, a much more "Boy Oriented" activity. But something, that I'm positive, all of us will enjoy! We've already started counting down...we go in June!

~Manders

They're 2!

Dear Abby and Robbie,

Happy 2nd Birthday! We can't believe how quickly, you are growing up. 2 years ago, we welcomed you both, into our family. The perfect fit! The 2 of you, made our family whole, and complete.

We can't get over, how big you are getting. How quickly time is passing. And how much fun we're having! Sometimes, we just want to press "Pause." Because we know, that soon you will be too big for cuddles and butterfly kisses.

2 years ago, we were anxious to meet you. Lauren talked to you both, every day. Telling you, about all the fun, you'd have. And you know what, she was right. What a fun big sister, you guys have. She helps you 2, get into a lot of fun!

Just a year ago, you were both wobbling around. Really trying to master your walking. Today, you both are running full speed! Riding ponies. And showing me, how real cowgirls and cowboys dance!

These 2 years, have flown by! We've made so many memories. And we look forward, to all the memories, that we still have to make! Most of all, we look forward to, watching you 2 grow. And become amazing people.

We know that we're lucky! To be your Mommy and Daddy. That God sent us, 2 of the most perfect souls. And trusted us, to raise you. And shape you. Into beautiful souls. An amazing woman, and man. Your Mommy and Daddy, are trying their best. But most of all, we want you to know, that we'll ALWAYS love you both! Happy 2nd Birthday!!!

~Love, Mommy and Daddy

Happy St. Patrick's Day!

Happy St. Patty's Day! Do you have any special plans? Well, we did. Until Wednesday. When we found out, Lauren had to dance. It was a last minute thing. So it put a wrench in our plans. But that's OK. We all enjoy, watching her. She's seriously, the cutest little dancer, that I've ever seen! :)

We are starting our day with green pancakes. Yum! Billy has actually, just headed down to the kitchen. And our kiddos, are all half asleep. Just climbed into Mommy and Daddy's bed, for Saturday morning cartoons. How else, would you start St. Patty's Day?



After Lauren performs, we're going to my friend's Baby Shower. She expecting her 3rd baby. Her 1st little girl! Talk about an excited lady! :) And we get to see Lola again! She's hosting the shower.

Then the whole "Birthday Party Schedule," sorta fell through. Because of this dance thing. And Spring Break. And my In-Laws can't come. Oh, and the Rodeo next weekend. That means, Sals is going to have her 2 parties next weekend. And I'll have our 2, the following weekend. Gives me a few more days, to finish up my projects!

It's not all bad news. Just a few complcations. But nothing, that we can't deal with. I'd rather postpone, and have my In-Laws here. It wouldn't be the same, without them. And this way, I can help Sals.

My girls and I, are sporting our green nails. And we've all, picked out something green to wear. Billy and Robbie have big plans today. To go help J, with a project. I'm not exactly sure of the details. But it's "Guy Time." That I'm sure, they're all excited about!

I better get going. I have lots of cuddling to do! With my 3 kiddos. Before breakfast is ready. And our day really begins. Happy St. Patty's Day, from our house, to yours!

~Manders

Oh So Innocent!

Early this week, Lauren and I, ran into Walgreen's. Billy was home with the twins. And he called me, to ask me, to pick up a few things. Right after Lauren's dance practice, we stopped. The lines were crazy! And these are the times, when I'm grateful for my kids. My easy going, don't throw tantrum kids. :)

Eventually, they opened the register, in the Beauty section. And we headed that way. Lauren had been a doll! Carrying a card we picked up, some cough drops, and a pack of chapstick. The girl, didn't even ask for anything!

This Mommy, was feeling oh so guilty! You see, I was carry milk, bandaids, some chocolate for Billy, and 4 magazines. Of that stuff, only the first 3 were on our list. So I told Lauren, to pick something out. We had 2 people in front of us. So I wasn't worried.

What I hadn't noticed was, Lauren was eyeing the nail polish stash. All the gorgeous colors, lined up. Immediately, she went for this green nail polish.



Her reasoning, it was perfect for St. Patty's Day! Because she has to dance that day. And won't be wearing green the whole time. I think Lauren's worried about getting pinched. So we bought the nail polish. Mommy might have also picked up a new lipstick. :)

What I will say is, my girls LOVE nail polish. We actually have weekly "nail painting" nights! This week, we all went for "Innocent" nails.

2 things about this nail polish. I LOVE the color. It's not a crazy neon. But a nice, bright green. I also love the consistency of the polish. It's really easy to work with. Even with 2 little girls. 2 coats later, we were ready for St. Patty's Day! Between, that was 3 days ago. And there is no signs of chips! Best $2 nail polish, that I know of!

On a quick note, Happy Birthday Cari! We can't wait to celebrate with you. How exciting this day is. The beginning of you, becoming a real "woman." Happy 13th!

~Manders

Working in Las Vegas

For the last few days, we've been in Las Vegas. Mostly for work. The band was performing. And more importantly, we got to spend some time with Lola, Hills, this guy, and this guy. Friends that we don't get to see often.

Working in Las Vegas is always a lot of fun! There are so many fun things to do. With shows every night. Unfortunately, we had to leave Lauren, with my parents. Because she's in school now. But we're lucky. That my parents are able to stay with her. And of course take care of her. Thank you Mom and Dad!

I'm not going to lie, we missed our little girl. But I know she had a great time! With my parents. I have a feeling, that many afternoons, were filled with ice cream and dolls. :)



We did get to take our twins with us. During the day, we enjoyed lots of the sights. The twins are at that age, when they just soak everything up! Our favorite place, was definitely The M&M's World! The bright colors, were an instant hit! And they were mesmerized with the Fountains!

I was lucky too! Anna Marie, watched the twins at night. When I had to go to work. Let me tell you, that was HUGE! Can you just imagine me, trying to do Lola's hair and makeup, with 2 tired kids?

There was a time, when the band worked all the time! Traveled a lot more. But in the last 5 years or so, lots of things have changed. Many of us are now married, with kids. Lola has moved. And well, I think we're all in a new phase of life.

So when we get gigs like this, we all enjoy them. I know, as a group, we could book more gigs. We're asked all the time! But as a group, we find it better, to limit the jobs we work. Right now, our personal lives, mean much more to us. And honestly, I like it that way. Besides, we're all close friends. And see each other weekly, if not daily!

Yes, it's been a busy time around here. But I'm happy to be home. With my kiddos. Doing the "ordinary" things. Like cuddling in bed, watching cartoons. As Billy gets ready for the day. And doing laundry, while making snacks, for my twins. These are the things, that life is made of.

When we're old and gray, I'm sure we'll remember, lots of our gigs. I might even remember the amazing shoes, that I wore Sunday night. To that important party. Right after our show. But it's these "everyday memories," that I'm going to cherish much more!

~Manders

Adorable Dolls

Do you remember last week, when I blogged about this hat? Super cute! Well, I decided to explore Think Crafty Thoughts some more. :) It's such a fun blog! And has so many great patterns. I'd definitely recommend it to anyone who crochets. :)

I decided to sit down the other night, and really go through all the patterns. That's when I found this great pattern. For these dolls. They remind me of "Nesting Dolls." Lauren has a set of "Nesting Dolls," that my mom made her. They're wooden, and my mom painted them. They were the best present, for my then 2 year old daughter. :) She still plays with them. Almost 3 years later!

So this pattern, really got my attention. Lauren just loves those dolls! And I wish that I had found this pattern a few weeks ago. I would have LOVED to have made these for Lauren's birthday. But that is just a week away!



But I couldn't get these dolls out of my head. Does that ever happen to you? I visited this post, at least 10 times. Then I decided to print it out. I'm 99% positive, that I have all the supplies. And if I start them today, I might have them done, by Easter. I think this would be an adorable addition to her Easter Basket!

Now to just find some time. Being a mommy of 3, time is always a precious commodity. Especially, when you are trying to create some "surprises." But I'm hopeful. And I really do think, I can get all these things done, before the big days ahead!

~Manders

Fast Food...

I've blogged many times, about Lauren's Little Pink Playhouse. To date, it's the best money, that Billy and I, have ever spent on a toy. No lie!

Anytime that Lauren has some money, she wants to buy something for her playhouse. When anyone asks Lauren, what she wants for Christmas, or her birthday, she asks for something for her playhouse. Lucky us, T-Lo always sends something fun!

I can't lie. The other night, I couldn't sleep. So I logged on to our computer, and started "Blog Hopping." :) Not only did I find a fun, and new blog...I found this fun pattern!



In our house, we make pancakes once a week. And on special days...like birthdays, anniversaries, and holidays. This was a "no brainer" to me. I printed off this pattern. Looked through my yarn. And tonight, I'm going to start working on it.

This is going to be one of Lauren's birthday presents. :) I just wish that I could find some other quick, and easy patterns. Because I know that she will enjoy some new toys, for her playhouse. I don't mind buying the patterns either. So if you have some ideas, please leave me a comment. I'm always looking for new ideas, patterns, Etsy shops, etc.

~Manders

New in 2012: The Twins Ride a Horse...

Before, I sound utterly insane, let me share, some important things with you. I married a cowboy. A genuine cowboy. That once rode bulls. It got him through college. And for a while, Billy did this for a living. I KNOW! This is INSANE!

But I still LOVE my hubby so much! And I'm so grateful, that by the time we met, he had gone on, to a much safer job. :) He still rides, from time to time. With his buddies, or brother. And it still makes me nervous, as heck! But I'm grateful, that he understands, his health is much more important to me. And our kids.

Well, it must be in the genes. Lauren picked up Mutton Busting. When she was just over 2 years old! It's stressed me out! Since that very first day. But I'm Momma. And I must let her little wings, learn how to fly. I know. Within reason. But in a "Cowboy Family," these are just "normal" things. Normal things, that make my heart beat faster, than normal!

Animals, are no stranger to my kiddos. Not at all! Not when your husband, and in-laws, sell cattle and livestock. Not when you own horses, chickens, sheep, cows, ducks, pigs, and just about any other farm animal, that you can think of!

I bet you never saw that coming! Not from this makeup loving girl. But it's the truth. I grew up in a mountain community. One that would liven up, in the winter. When all these skiers would come to town. Me? I was much more interested in makeup, clothing, and jewelry. I left my family, for the "Big City." And I began my "Beauty Adventures."

I went Beauty School. Where my days were all about makeup, hair, and beauty. Every day, was about the latest trends, and fashion. I was very comfortable with that. But it all changed. That day, when I was working, and spotted Billy.

Literally, weeks later, I was moving to the small town. Where we currently live. And I was learning how to ride a horse. To be honest, I'd ride with my husband. As in, I'd sit right in front of Billy, on the same horse. Until, our daughter started riding. That was years later. But it took me, that long, to get the guts to ride alone.

Yes, my young daughter, has always been comfortable with horses. Billy would take her riding, when she was months old. One of his favorite pictures, is when Lauren was 6 months old. He took her for a ride. On a horse. And I sat and cried. On our porch, the entire time!

It shouldn't have surprised me, when Billy came home, with a pony. My daughter was 18 months old. And I immediately, began to stress out. Billy promised, to wait a while. Little did I know, days later, she begged. Begged to ride her pony. And Billy gave in!

From that point on, my daughter has been on her pony. With a helmet. And for months, her Daddy, would hold onto her. Making sure, that she wouldn't fall off. What I didn't know, was Lauren would love it. ABSOLUTELY LOVE IT!!!

When she was 2, she started Mutton Busting. And darn it, she was good at it! Really good. As in, she won 8 out of 8 competitions, before she was 3! And when she turned 3, she was teaching her pony, how to jump.

Yes, my daughter dances. She LOVES being a ballerina. But her "Cowboy" roots, still pull at her. And she continues to jump, and Mutton Bust. Oh, I'm so worried, about our future. I'm just glad, that girls don't ride bulls. Because I might just die!

Well, right before Valentine's Day, we went to a local Rodeo. Not our first. I'm pretty sure, not our last. Lauren was going to be competing. And we were going to watch some friends. I did not realize, that my twins, would all of a sudden, fall in love, with those horses!



Oh yes! February 11th, changed my life. When my twins would yearn for those horses. Billy and I talked about it. But I just wasn't sure. Why? Why must they want, to do dangerous things? Why can't they stay babies?

Well, Billy and some friends, went to pick up some ponies. 2 to be exact. And we let the twins, get used to them. Petting them. Talking to them. That sort of thing. Which honestly, they're already used to!

The original plan, was to wait until their birthday. I wanted them, to at least be 2. But things don't always work that way. And this week, my heart literally stopped. As our twins took their first rides.

Oh brother! I might die an early death. No lie! But they were so excited! I've NEVER seen bigger smiles. Yes, there were helmets involved. Daddy holding onto Robbie. J making sure Abby didn't fall. They had a blast! Were on horses for 2 hours!

I know. My kids must grow. I NEED to let them grow. To grow their little wings, and fly. Just a bit. But it still worries me. Still makes my heart stop. And makes me say many more prayers.

This week, my twins, looked more like "kids." Less like "babies." I let them do "Big Kid" stuff. And they loved it! Yes, this week, they rode horses. Ponies actually. But you know what I mean.

Don't think we're bad parents. We're not. But we are "Cowboys." And this is how "We Roll!" Believe me, I still stress out! My kids are still not allowed to date, until they are 16. They can't drive until 16 either. Sleepovers, dances, and the such...I'm thinking about that age too. There are just certain things, this Momma refuses to budge on. But I will let them, ride a horse! :)

~Manders

Tea and Cookies Party Set Crochet Pattern

This morning, I was searching through Red Heart's website. They have a TON of free patterns. And I was just looking through them. To see if anything would catch my eye. That's when I found this pattern.



Isn't it adorable? I was thinking of making this tea set, for my girls. If it's not too tough, and too time consuming, I might make them each one. Maybe for their birthdays. Which are in a few weeks. Oh, I think this would be fun!

~Manders

New in 2012: Sewing Curtains

I know. Another post about sewing. But I'm so excited about this project! Technically, I order this fabric, late last week. But it just came in. Yesterday evening. I was so excited! You see, Billy and Lauren are working on a project. They're repainting her Little Pink Playhouse. :)

It's going to be pink with white trim. But the little shutters and doors, are going to be red! So fun! And I thought, with a new paint job, Lauren's Little Pink Playhouse, could use some new curtains. Maybe a few pillows, and a little blanket. :) So I got started, last night, after the kids went to bed. Just look at this fabric!



Now let me start off with this. I sew. A little. Very little! I've made a few simple blankets for my kids, my nephew, and some of my friend's kids. Nothing fancy. I've worked on some other simple projects. And I've started these projects. Do you remember them?

Well, I started with measurements. I figured it was a great place to start. Then, I sat and stared at my fabric for a long time. It was expensive! And I didn't want to mess up. (On a side note, I want to order some more fabric. It's expensive. But Mwendas has such cute prints!) A few late night calls to Lola, and my mom, got me through the bumps. I didn't want plain curtains. I wanted something with a little style. A little fun. And these 2 ladies had the perfect ideas to add.

A few minutes ago, I pretty much finished the curtains, and I pinned the pillows and blanket. I still need to add a little trim. I'm actually stuck between 2 different trims. I had hoped to have them done, by the time I had to go pick up Lauren from school. But I just couldn't decide on a trim. So I'll wait until I pick her up, and let her decide. This was such a fun and easy project! I'm not so afraid of my sewing machine now. :)

~Manders

Fun Cupcakes!!!

Lately, I've really been interested in baking. I'm thinking, that cold weather, has something to do with that. The weather has been uncharacteristically cold. The wind, we're used to. The cold, not so much!

The twins and I, have stayed inside. Bundled up. We only venture out, to take and pick up Lauren from school. That's it! It's so cold! But it has meant lots of cuddling time. We've done a lot of reading, movie watching, and just hanging out.

I've also done a lot more cooking. I cook every day. But I've ventured out of my comfort zone. Just a bit. Started using my slow cooker more. Opened up those cookbooks. The ones we got when Billy and I got married. And I've been baking.

I'm sure, that by now, you know I'm planning 2 birthday parties. I also have a love affair with boxed desserts. And well, I'm becoming a recipe stalker. While searching for a fun recipe, I found these cute cupcakes. :)




So fun! They remind me so much of Lauren! And I'm pretty sure, that she is going to love them. I'm thinking, maybe Lola and Lizzie can help me make them. Whatever the theme of the party is, these will be perfect! Maybe I can do a test run tonight. Because the more I look at this picture, the more I want these cupcakes!

~Manders

New in 2012: Box Play for Kids

Not long ago, my sister-in-law and I were talking. I swear to you, Robbie is obsessed with boxes! For Christmas it's ALL he wanted to play with. Every time we get a package, he just wants the box! My SIL was telling me, that her sons are the same way.

My SIL made a wonderful discovery last year. Box Play for Kids. Have you heard about them? It's a company, that sells stickers. Not just any stickers. But stickers to put on boxes, egg cartons, milk cartons, and toilet paper rolls. Which turn the boxes into new toys! Yes, they are adorable! And guess what, my SIL sent my kiddos a bunch! This is what we got to try out this week! Just look at what we got. :)



Remember, they were mostly for Robbie. My boy. So this tractor was just perfect! And only $5. It's made for hours, and hours of good playtime!



How about a cow? Around our family, this is the best $8 you could spend! We're all about farm animals!



Let's play doctor. This eye chart is too cute! And just $6. I can hear my twins, for hours, playing with this box. I'm not lying. They even hold a cup over one eye! :)



How about a $5 piano? This is one of Abby's favorites! She sings to herself, and pretends to play. She even tells Billy, that she's practicing to be in the BBs!!!



A $5 camera! This one, all 3 of my kids love! I'm kinda of wanting to order a couple more of these. Because they go around, "snapping pictures," all day long!



How about bowling? This set is only $4! And has given our family, hours of fun. We actually got 3 sets of these. And set it up, in our hallway. Literally, our kids could play for hours!



An $8 pink refrigerator. Where was this, when we were buying stuff for Lauren's Little Pink Playhouse? Could have saved us some serious money!



How about a Bento Box for pretend play? This one is $6. And I see Lauren and Abby "feeding" their babies for hours and hours. So cute!



I'm not going to lie, after my SIL told me about this website, I went to peak around. I bookmarked it. And said I was going to order a few things. That was before the holidays. And just the other day, I was thinking about this website. And I figured that I'd order some stuff, for Easter.

But after we got our gifts, I went back to the website. I'm telling you, my kids are in LOVE with these stickers! And guess what I found? Some free Valentine's! Immediately, I downloaded the file. This was one of the gifts we gave our kids. :) Filled with lots of goodies. I also made some, for our friends' kiddos!

Who in the world, would have thought, my kids would LOVE these so much! I'll never look at a toilet paper roll the same way again. Never! Are there any fun toys or crafts, that you've found. Or think we should take a look at. Please let me know!

~Manders

Remembering Those Days...

Have you ever read Sarah's blog? It's one of my favorites. I've been reading it for a while now. And I've blogged about Sarah before. She is expecting her first baby, baby Jane. Any day, Sarah's sweet girl, will be here. But when I saw this picture, it got me thinking...



I was thinking about that time, right before Lauren was born. I was super excited! I knew that I was having a little girl. And I would dream about her. Dream about all the fun we'd have. The time we'd spend together. All the cuddling we'd do.

At the same time, I was miserable. Everything hurt. I was beyond uncomfortable. I wanted to have my baby. I wanted to feel normal again. To see my feet. I was getting anxious. I started to think, about all the things I didn't know. How in the world, was I going to get through this...

Those last few days, were the hardest. I didn't know what to expect. I was feeling horrible. I was silently, having these meltdowns in my head. I was somewhere between being pregnant, and being a real mommy. I'd felt like a mom, since the day I found out I was pregnant. But I really hadn't experienced everything that the label meant. Not yet.

I've been thinking about Sarah a lot. Praying for her. I don't know her. I've posted a comment here and there. Sent her a handful of emails. But I really don't know her, beyond her blog. But being a mommy, just makes you want to support, the newest members, into our little club.

It's funny. Those last few days, before my baby was born, seemed like forever. But there's something about them, that I'd like to experience again. Something that was so magical. Unknown. And peaceful. I hope that Sarah, can find some of that same peace too!

~Manders

Being Honest with Me

My kiddos, my gifts from God, have been in bed, for less than an hour. My hubby, the sweet man that I love, is hard at work. He's finalizing all these plans, for a work trip. That we're leaving on, this weekend. And I'm sitting here, feeling incredibly lost...

If you've noticed, I've blogged more this week, than I usually do. I'm feeling a bit lonely. A bit lost. A bit...well I can't put my finger on it. My life, is everything I've ever wanted. Plus more! I have this incredible man that I love. And whom I know, loves me in return, more than any one person can love. We have 3 amazing, and healthy children. A beautiful home. Food on our table. Health. A good and steady income. Which these days, is not common.

Don't get me wrong, I'm so grateful for all these things. But something is missing. And I can't put my finger on it. I just don't know what it is. But it's bothering me. Do you ever feel this way?



I think I've been panicking about things, that I just can't control. We were supposed to go to Texas this Friday, but it just didn't work out. And you know what, it really bothers me. I was looking forward, to spending time with Billy's family. And I was honestly, looking forward to spending some time on the Ranch.

Lizzie and I, just haven't been spending much time together. I know. We're both married now. We live about 90 minutes away, from one other. But I miss my sister. The weather hasn't helped either. It makes the roads bad, and then neither of us, wants to travel. Even when we've planned to.

Speaking of the weather, it's also made me a bit sad. Or restless. Maybe both. The kids and I leave to take Lauren to school. But we only get out of the car to take her inside. And maybe for a quick run to the grocery store. We then stay inside, all day. Until we go pick Lauren up. There are the drives to church, and dance practice. But that's it.

I'm 100% positive, it's bothering the entire family. But it's been so cold. And more windy than normal. The wind is so strong. I know the twins can't handle it. Heck, I have to carry them, when it gets real bad. Because they just can't stand up. My poor babies!

But all these things are wearing on me. I can feel it. I'm so tense. I can't turn my thoughts off. I almost feel like I'm panicking. Somewhere deep down inside. It's so nuts, that I was literally mad at the TV, on Monday night. Because we weren't getting a signal. The weather was that bad. Our kiddos were asleep. The internet connection was weak. Billy was working. I just got frustrated, and went to bed. I wasn't even sleepy!

Today, I called my friend. Lola always has this amazing outlook on life. If you read her blog, or have the pleasure of knowing her, you know what I mean. :) She's positive, during the worst of times. She has had to battle cancer, off and on, for a few years now. And she never once, gets mad. Or asks why. She just smiles, and looks for the good in life.

I knew, in my heart and soul, that I needed to talk to her. I spent the twins' nap time on the phone. Telling her what was going on. How I was feeling. And she just listened. Reassured me, as I cried. And in the end, she had some words, that just hit home.

What did Lola tell me? To just hand over my burdens to God. To pray. To pray hard. With my entire body, mind, spirit, heart, and soul. Just pray. And really mean it. To ask God, to carry some of these burdens, as I work through them. One at a time. And to talk to Billy. I've been bad about that. I've been keeping all this inside. He knows that something is bothering me. But I just refuse to burden him.

I know this is wrong. He's my husband. My partner. The man that has promised, to go through life, by my side, loving me. I know this. But sometimes, I just don't want to bother him. Then Lola reminded me of this guy. And how he has this incredibly crazy schedule. Lives in the spotlight. And that she still turns to him. When things are too tough for her, she leans on him. And he loves more for it. Happily helping her, through some of her toughest problems.

Lastly, she reminded me of my 3 beautiful babies. My entire life revolves around them. I remember as a little girl, praying to God, to let me be a mommy one day. And my dreams came true. I was blessed with 3 beautiful and healthy children. That love me. And have taught me so much. I need to remember that. Remember that they're the reason, I push forward.

Earlier tonight, I talked to Billy. Really let him know what was bothering me. Sure, we were doing the dishes. And the kids were watching a movie. But I just needed to get it out. I even called my mom, as Billy took the kids a bath. It helped so much!

In the end, I realize, that I haven't been taking care of me. I've forgotten about myself. I've neglected myself. Put me, last. And if I'm going to be 100% for my family, I need to take care of me. I need to do things, that are going to make me a whole and happy person.

To be honest, all those things that I really enjoy, I've let go of. I can't even tell you, when I last went shopping for me. I have no clue! I used to go browse through the makeup, clothes, and shoes. These days, I buy makeup when I'm going to be working. I shop for clothes, because I absolutely need them. Nothing is getting done out of pleasure.

My days of leisurely reading...I don't know what happened to them. I have a pile of magazines, that I haven't even touched! I have 4 books that I started, and still haven't made it past the 3rd chapter. I just don't do things for me.

Billy and I have talked about this. And we've made a deal. Granted that Lizzie feels the same way. At least once a month, he's going to play Mr. Mom. Just for the day, all day! So I can go see my sister. Nothing too crazy. Just lunch and talking. Billy will stay home with the twins, and get Lauren to school. And dance practice.

I think part of my anxiety is, I've been thinking a lot about my brothers. Robert has really been on my mind. I don't know what it is. Maybe the fact that Robbie acts and looks, just like my brother. Maybe I feel guilty. You know, because I have this amazing life. One that he never got to experience. And I stress about my little brother. When will he return to the USA? He's in the Marines. And is still at war. I worry about him all the time!

I've had a lot on my mind. I don't want to burden my friends. Or my family. But I'm realizing, I can't do this on my own. I know that Sals has her hands full. But I definitely know, she gets this mommy stress. I need to not be afraid, to talk to her. I need to make more time, to talk with Lola. She always keeps my head on straight.

Bless you, if you've made it this far. I rarely, if ever, blog like this. I find blogging to be fun. It's something I do, to make myself feel better. I want to add positive thoughts to the world. I want to share things with my readers and friends. Not burden them!

I miss blogging about silly things...like makeup, shopping, and other hobbies of mine. I need to get back to that. Carve out a little space for me. And my interests. I don't want to lose myself. I want to show my kids, that it's important to stay true to yourself. To add things to the world.

Every morning, I start my day, with reading the bible. But I want to add, some more meaningful thoughts. I go to bible study, once a week. And I want to incorporate some of that, into my morning reading. I've also bought a journal. A place to get all those buried feelings and thoughts out. A little more private than my blog. A place, where I can be honest with myself.

I hope I don't scare anyone away. But I just needed to get this out. Sometimes, mommy-hood can get a little overwhelming. A little stressful. And a little lonely. The important thing to remember is, we're not alone. There are so many mommas out there. That are going through the same thing. And we all have God. He's our biggest supporter.

I'm off now. To soak in the tub. With lots of bubbles. And my favorite magazine. Something I haven't done, in so very long! Billy and I, just might get a little crazy, and break out the ice cream too. The best late night snack.

I hope that this post can help someone else. To show you, that we all struggle along the way. That we're not alone. I'm learning, that I can't plan everything. I can't control everything. I'm discovering who I am. And what I really want. What's most important in life. And I know now, that I deserve it. And I need it.

~Manders

Little Polka Dot Tea Set

It's almost been a year, since Maribel got her tea set, from her Nana. AKA T-Lo. It was her birthday present. And immediately, Lauren was in love with it! LOVE! It looked just like this one. By the way, isn't this the cutest?!?!?! (A potential birthday idea.)



Well, we've searched everywhere. And I mean EVERYWHERE for this tea set! With absolutely no luck. A $5 toy from Wal-Mart. And it's causing so much stress! Lauren doesn't ask for much. Honestly. But this little set, she's been eyeing it for so long! Lola, Sals, Anna Marie, Emmers, Gabi, Crafty Mom, and Lizzie have all looked. With no luck. :(

It's almost Lauren's birthday. And I'd LOVE to give her this tea set. I've searched online, in stores, and at yard sales. With no luck! So I'm turning to you. My dear readers. Have you seen this tea set? I'd be willing to pay you for it. Please, if you can help, please leave me a comment. Thank you all!

~Manders

Smash

Have you happened to catch Smash? It's a new show! On NBC. I'm a HUGE fan of Glee. So when I heard about Smash, I just knew that I needed to watch it. :)



Last night when we watched it, I let our kiddos stay up a little later than usual. They enjoy Glee too! So I thought, this would be something, they'd like. One thing about our family, shows that our kids enjoy, we TiVo. And usually watch the next day, as a family.

This worked at really well. All 3 of our kids, were singing away. Our daughters were dancing too! We're just a very musical family. And enjoy spending time, enjoying music, and shows that celebrate the arts.

I would definitely recommend this show to anyone, who likes Glee. Or even Dancing with the Stars. It left me in such a great mood! And I can't wait until next week's episode. I think Katharine McPhee, finally found a project that really fits her. Perfectly!

~Manders

Planning 2 Birthday Parties

I spent 3 hours, last night, on this website. Trying to get some ideas. My kiddos' birthdays are in a few weeks. About 6 weeks to be honest! And I have absolutely no idea, what kind of party, we're going to have.



I do know, that we'll throw Lauren her own party. And the following weekend, the twins will have theirs. But that's all I know. Last year, Lauren wanted a Cowgirl and Pony party. That just what she got. :) It was really a lot of fun! And we had a cute Barn Animal party for the twins. This year, I'm all out of ideas!

Sals is planning a Sesame Street themed party, for her twins. Such a great idea. Because they LOVE Sesame Street. Me? I have no ideas. AT ALL!!! Lauren has no specific ideas either. Last year, she knew months ahead of time. This year, she just wants a strawberry cake with whipped cream. :)

Do you have any ideas? We'd welcome any suggestions! Any! To be 100% honest, I'm leaning towards a ballerina or dress up party for Lauren. She's big into both of those areas. And I think that she'd enjoy it. For the twins...I have no idea. What kind of party can I throw my sweet babies?

~Manders

New in 2012: College Basketball

We're really trying to do new things, as a family, in 2012. I should start off with, I'm not a big sports fan. At all. I've just never gotten into it. But I'll try and watch with Billy. I enjoy a good rodeo. Or a football game...because of my brother. He played football in high school. But that's usually were it stops and starts for me.

We live near a college town. And I can count the number of times, that I've gone to a game. 3 times! And they were all football games. It's probably been 3 years since we've gone. Yes, it's been a while. Although, whenever there is a football game, of any kind on, it's on in our house.

Billy and I were talking the other day. We like to take our kids on adventures. We go to all sorts of places. But honestly, most of our activities, are for our daughters. And we were starting to feel guilty. That's when the idea of going to a game, came to mind.



It took a bit of planning. A trip to the college bookstore. Our kiddos needed some new outfits! And we were on our way. We wanted our kiddos to really enjoy the entire experience. So there were hotdogs, popcorn, nachos, and some sweet treats. We had foam fingers, pom-poms, and some bells that they handed out.

I never thought that we'd have that much fun. But it was a night full of fun! Our kids never complained, or fussed. They cheered for our team. Jumped up and down, every time they scored. Pistol Pete was the bees knees to them! I have to admit it, I had a great time too. Right now, I'm looking at the schedule. Wondering when we can go back again. Ya, it's something that we're going to be doing again. I'm sure Robbie appreciates it! You know, doing some boy stuff.

~Manders